House Of Night's Cell Block Tango
by Sophie-kills-like-Nny35
Summary: Six of the HoN girls have been burned by the men in their life. Not that they'll live long enough to regret it. Read their story, see their side, and know that they did in fact. Had it comin'
1. POP

**Uggggghh… This is what happeneds when you watch WAAAAAYY too many youtube videos of "The Cell Block Tango" revised with Disney, and Dreamworks because your too childish too be her age best friend drag you into it, just because she thinks its "Oh-so-awesome". (I'm looking at you 16). So enjoy the HoN version of… The Cell Block Tango. Starting off with Aphrodite and Erik in "**_**Pop**_**". Why Erik? Because I like Darius and really don't want to see him get the ax… So yeah for the majority the girls here will only kill the guys they've been with that I DON'T like them being with… Or hate to the very marrow of my being. You know who is whom!**

**P.S. The *** is basically the name given in the song… But this is for the characters in HoN. So please accept it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the HoN characters. They belong to P.C. and Kristen. I don't own the song The Cell Block Tango. That belongs to whoever wrote it or whoever own Chicago.**

_*Aphrodite-Pop*_

'_You know how people have these little 'habits' that get you down?_'

Aphrodite was having an extremely crappy day. It seemed that the whole world or even the universe just decided to say, "Fuck you Aphrodite". Seriously, nothing has gone right for her.

At her job she had to deal with asshole after asshole. One of her co-workers obviously can't take the hint to bring her own food instead of stealing others. And the worst of it all was that her car was towed for being parked on a red curb, which came out of nowhere, and missed the only bus to her place.

Finally, after walking for a mile, and in her brand new shoes no less, she was home.

'…_And I'm looking for a little bit of sympathy. And there's ***, lying on the couch._'

Aphrodite and Erik started living together not one year ago. Not that it improved her life in any way, but she can't exactly blame him for anything real bad things that happened to her. Unfortunately, he had habits she would rather have been better not knowing about. Like for an example, he always had a pack of gum on him and would always pop that gum as loud as he could.

It aggravated her to the extreme.

And there he was laying the couch _he_ got for _their_ living room. It was comfy yes, but she hated the design and how it did not blend with any part of the rest of the apartment.

'_Drinking a beer and chewing. No not chewing, popping.'_

_POP_

God did she hate that sound. It was like she could feel the sound grinding on her teeth.

_POP_

"Oh hey babe." Erik said, finally realizing that she was there.

_POP_

Now the beer she could handle. Hell she likes to drink a bit herself, but that terrible popping was driving her,

_POP_

Nuts. _Grrrrrrr._

'_So I said to him, I said, "You pop that gum one more time…"'_

"Please. My head hurts, and I had a really bad day at work. I would rather have some quiet around here." Aphrodite told Erik, who just stared at her.

"Babe, how can me popping possibly be upsetting to you? I mean you've never complained before." He said, before,

_POP_

'_*sigh* And he did._'

Aphrodite couldn't tell what happened after that. It was like something just snapped.

So instead of bitching and yelling at him to spit his freaking gum out, she just quietly walked into the other room.

There was a hunting gun in there. Rarely used, seeing as how they lived in the city and Erik only ever hunts when he's invited by his "buddies" if only to prove that he can do so.

'_So, I took the shotgun off the wall and fired two warning shots…_'

Aphrodite had little confidence that she could even figure out how to shot the damn thing but she couldn't help herself.

She aimed. And warned once more.

"Shut. That gum. Up." She said slowly.

_POP_

'_Into his head._'

Not surprisingly, the cops were crashing her door down before she could even put the gun away. She didn't even have time to have her say before they forced the gun out of her hands, forced her to the floor, and cuffed her up.

The entire trip to the jail house she was screaming.

'_He had it coming! He had it coming! He only had himself to blame._'

Not that it reached the officers either way.

She was sent to prison with 5 to 25 year sentence. Thankfully, she wasn't alone in prison. She discovered that other women where sent there for similar excuses and reasons. In a way it made her smile. Something to take pride in when she would tell her story.

Always giving that same argument everytime.

'_If you'da been there. If you'da heard. I betcha you would've done the same!_'

**So what'da think? I'm kinda proved of this one myself for what it came from. (Damn you 16) Anyway R&R and shit. Oh and if you think I "over-swear" in this chapter… This is Aphrodite. She the only one who swears like a sailor in this series.** **Anyway, one more time. R&R.**


	2. SIX

**Alright next chapter of the House of Night Cell Block Tango… This I getting fun I have to admit. Next up is "****Six****" starring Zoey and Heath. And before you ask no… I don't have anything against him… It's just that I already used Erik and I like Stark… But what about Loren you ask? Don't ask. I don't want to say anything. I'm really gonna word this out funky. But hope it's enjoyable. Enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I own neither HoN or the CBL.**

_*Zoey-Six*_

When I met Heath I honestly thought it was forever. He was kind, sweet, caring, incredibly handsome…

'_And he told me he was single. And we hit it off right away._'

The first couple of weeks were incredible too. Though we didn't really do _those_ sort of things. But to me the dates we went on were soooo magical and romantic. I never wanted what we had together to stop. So a thought came to mind, well really _both_ of our minds- or so he told me.

'_So we started living together._'

At first it was hard, mostly because he had a full time job, but we made it work I the end.

'_He'd go to work. He'd come home. I'd fix him a drink, we'd have dinner._'

Everything was perfect. So wonderfully perfect. Sure for the most part it sounds like a rut. But we were happy with the consistency that surrounded our little life.

It was funny because my stupid parents really didn't approve of him. I'd never understood why though. Heath was an amazing guy, and well my stupid step-loser of a father seemed to me to be worse. If Heath was all that bad to begin with at all.

Or at least that's what I first thought about him.

'_And then I found out._'

I couldn't help myself. I just couldn't. One day it seemed that Heath was taking longer than he usually does to come back home. So I decided to go to work to see what was holding him up.

What I found was him just _THEN _heading home. But he was going a completely different direction.

SO I followed. And I was surprised that I didn't hear a _thunk_ from my jaw hitting the floor.

'_Single he told me. SINGLE MY ASS!_'

That… That… That… BASTARD! Okay I was ticked off. Usually I don't swear that often. I mean it's a bad habit. But that doesn't mean I can't swear when the time calls for it.

For example; Now! Now is the perfect time to use some serious potty language. I mean…

'_Not only was he married. Oh no… He had six wives._'

I mean who the hell just agrees to marry a man to _**6**_ other women? And if he had that many women in his life already, why go after me? Why twist my heart all into knots?

That rat bastard.

Well I guess if he wanted to not only do the married gang bang with an affair in the mix… Why not let him pay the price.

'_So, that night when he came home from work. I fixed him his drink as usual._'

"So, Heath," I started innocently enough. "How was work today?" I asked him while I added the liquids to his cup.

"It was okay I guess." He said, making it sound like it really was an uneventful day. But was that surprise I heard in his voice? It was probably because I don't really ask him that much about his job.

"Here's your drink." I said, smiling sweetly handing him his alcohol.

"Uh, thanks Zo. You seem to be in a good mood. What's up?" He asked in, if I didn't know any better, a very naïve voice.

I just smiled even wider, when I say him take a drink.

"Oh nothing I just got rid of a plague that's been giving me problems." I said.

And after he downed his drink, I took quite the bit of pleasure watching him choke. After what seemed like a life-time, he finally collapsed, his color draining rapidly.

'_You know some guys just can't hold their arsenic._'

I couldn't help but laugh about it. It seemed like I was going to get away with it.

Hiding the body wasn't even all that hard. But unfortunately, there was still that little problem of all of his other wives of the week.

They noticed that he was gone for a while, started getting jealous of me and came with cops to investigate.

Needless to say I was screwed. They found the body almost immediately. Along with the poison I thought I threw away.

I was going to jail.

One of the other whore wife just looked at me with tears spilling in her eyes. I think she said her name was Kayla or something.

"Why? Why did you do this?"

_WHY! WAS SHE SERIOUSLY ASKING ME WHY I KILLED THIS SOB? _I thought to myself in huge amounts of shock I could not hide from my face.

I was beyond ticked at that point. So, with my hands still cuffed to my back with the cops holding me down all I could focus on was yelling at her what I felt about his death.

'_He had it comin', He had in comin'! He took the power in his pride! And then he used it! And he abused it!_'

I just kept yelling that to her. Screaming out profanities at her and the other wives from behind my back. I didn't stop even when I was finally placed in the police car and headed to jail.

Considering all of the horror stories I've heard, prison wasn't all that bad. At least they separated the women from men. That was a major plus in my book.

Besides I met up with this other girl who was in here for a similar crime. She said it was because her boyfriend made her snap with this really stupid habit. Telling me that I would've done the same thing. And I couldn't help but believe her.

"So why you here?" She asked me. And I told her.

"Sounds messy." She merely said after chuckling a little to herself.

"Not really." I said. "Besides I don't even see how _I_ should be here." I said out loud.

"Why?" She asked me.

I gave her the simplest of answers I could muster.

'_It was a murder but not a crime!_'

**And that was Six. How did you like it? Also did you see what I did there? In the end? Prepare for some more of that… Next up is Squish… Oh man I am sooo looking forward for that. R&R**


	3. SQUISH

**Hehehehehe…. Mwa-hahahaha… Okay I'll just flat out say it. I reeeeally enjoyed writing this one. Why? Four words: Rephiam as the milk-man. HAHAHAHA! Okay okay, just hear me out okay? Yes this is between Stevie Rae and Dallas(yes I DO hate him(to very marrow of my being in fact)) but only because I couldn't fit her into ****Uh-uh**** mostly because I didn't Rephiam to be killed off and I didn't Stevie Rae to be HAPPY with the dick. Besides the pairing for that one reeeeally fits better than it would with Stephiam. So here you go. ****Squish**** performed by Stevie Rae and Dallas! Enjoy! I know I will.**

**P.S. same rules apply from the first chapter. *** is the name given in the song but censored to be accepted into the story.**

**Disclaimer: I own neither the song or the characters.**

_*Stevie Rae-Squish*_

'_Now I'm standing in the kitchen. Carving up the chicken for diner. Minding my own business._'

Stevie Rae was both happy and upset with how her life was heading recently.

Not to say that she absolutely hated her life. She just felt… Well, under-appreciated.

She married Dallas* a couple years ago, and then she felt happiest. She thought she really loved him. But recently, the love was, in a way, disappearing. She couldn't place it, but it felt like the longer they stayed together, they drifted further apart. Wasn't it supposed to be the other way around?

Dallas even stopped being romantic with her. Though she could place when he did, she just knew he did. She was a girl with needs, a hopeless romantic if you will. A little romance once in a while couldn't hurt could it?

But try, try, try as hard as she did, Dallas just didn't seem to deliver. Like he was one of those guys who felt that as soon as you tie the knot you stop… Well… Doing it. Which really upset her even worse.

She didn't want to do _it_ all the time to have some passion, or romance, or the need to feel love. She just needed him to tell her that he loves her at least one time a day, if not just once in a while.

But no. It was like Dallas stopped loving her all together, which really broke her heart… Until she decided to grab some kind of romance for herself.

She couldn't help herself. She really couldn't. Dallas just all around stopped caring for her. She had to have _something_ in her life. Besides she saw the way that milk-man looked at her sometimes.

She sighed deeply. Was it wrong that the milk-man gave her more satisfaction in the love department than her own husband? But honestly he was the first perpetrator, flirting like he does with her when Dallas back is turned. But she had to take most of the blame; she did, in fact finally gave in and allowed him inside when Dallas went off to work and she had her day off work.

Stevie Rae sighed again, and went back to cutting up the bird. _I guess it's not so bad. Maybe that one time fling was what I needed to bring me and Dallas closer together._ Stevie Rae thought to herself, excluding the fact that she and the milk-man had more than a _one-_time fling. And in a deep dark corner of Stevie Rae's being, she hoped that Dallas would never, ever discover her deep dark secret.

'_In comes my husband *** in a jealous rage._

"_You've been screwing the milkman!" he says. He was crazy!'_

"D-Dallas! What? Why would you..?" Stevie Rae tried to form out the words, but Dallas wouldn't have it.

'_And he kept on screaming, "You've been screwing the milkman!"'_

Stevie Rae was getting scared now. She never figured Dallas for the jealous type, or even a violent type, but something was defiantly off about him.

"Dallas? Are you drunk?" Stevie Rae asked, slowly backing up to the kitchen island where she was carving the chicken.

He didn't answer her, he just closed in on her still screaming what she did.

"Didn't think I would find out did you? You whore!" Dallas shouted at her, practically lunging at her then. Stevie Rae screamed.

'_And then he ran into my knife._'

He really did. He didn't even see that she had a knife. And in all of the drama, fear and confusion, Stevie Rae sort of forgot that she had it.

Both of them wore huge faces of shock and horror. The dagger didn't hit anything vital, thank goodness, but still, the blood that was spilling was very unnerving.

"I'm so sorry." Stevie Rae said realizing that she hadn't yet removed the blade from his torso. Though her hand did release the knife once she realized where it currently was.

"I'll get it out." She exclaimed grabbing hold of the handle of the lethal blade that was lodge inside of him. Once her fingers circled around it a dark little thought formed in her mind.

_You're really gonna just let him off easy like that? He needs to be punished. You know what he was about to do to you. This was an accident. You don't need him._ The thought fogged her mind, and in a weird way, flashed her vision with… something dark. What she could name, but all she knew was that for as long as she was married to this man all of her happiness drained away.

'_He ran into my knife ten times._'

Once the blade was removed she just continued to bring it right back, grabbing his shoulders and forcing him against the blade nine more times. Until she finally hit not only his heart but both his lungs, and he collapsed on the ground.

She let out a laugh that sounded alien to her. It sounded both dark and mad, but strangely light and high pitched.

However Stevie Rae's mood quickly died a quicker death than Dallas' when she heard the front door open.

_Didn't Dallas lock that damned thing?_ Stevie Rae thought in a panic. Then before she could turn around to see who had come over, she heard the scream.

This time Stevie Rae could turn to see who it was. And she almost bolted when she saw who. It was Dallas' parents. DAMMIT! Why are they here? Today of all days.

Even on good days his parents never liked her. They were born and bred Catholics, and because Stevie Rae, well, wasn't raised up any way similar to that, they always thought of her as the Queen of the Damned. Now they had proof. She just killed their son.

Needless to say that they ran for the hills and called the cops. Which arrived quicker than Stevie Rae thought they would. And she was dragged to jail.

The whole time she was yelling at the officers the same exact thing.

'_If you'da been there, you'da seen it, I betcha you would have done the same!_'

**I think I put the most detail in this one. Oh well I'm proud of this. And I hope all you enjoy it too. And let me tell you I had the hardest of times writing that Stevie Rae and Dallas got hitched. Well that and not going into any specific details of Stevie Rae's affair… Hehehe I'll leave that to your imagination. You're welcome for the mental pictures. Hehe. Hey this almost sounds like the real HoN story doesn't it? Dallas shouting at Stevie Rae accusations that she slept with Rephiam and calling her a whore(which is one of the reasons why I hate him so much by the by), while she has the power to not only stop him, if not kill him. Anyway R&R and such and hopefully I'll post up "Uh-uh" real soon. And in case you're wondering I'll have it in English translations.**


	4. UHUH

**Okay the reason why I didn't update was for one reason and one reason alone: I seriously had no idea if any of the translation I got off of youtube are accurate. And I haven't seen the movie. I'm just going by what the translation says(and what 16 forced me to read from the Making Fiends fan fic… DAMN YOU 16!) Anyway this is probably gonna really sad, and pretty inaccurate. But anyway I hope that for the most part this satisfies you… Probably not in the end but the beginning might.**

**Disclaimer: I own neither song nor characters.**

_*Anastasia-Uh-uh*_

'_What am I doing here?'_

Anastasia had to be the happiest woman alive on the earth. Nothing seemed to put her down in the dumps. Mostly due to the fact that she was raised to be an optimist, as well as a pacifist. Life was just peaceful for her. Even though she couldn't exactly speak English all that much and she was in the states, she owned her own little flower shop with her own degree in botany. She loved viewing her sunflowers the most.

Of course her own little bit of happiness had to do greatly with English husband. She met him years ago when she was traveling abroad. And they just stayed together. Even with their opposite up-bringing. And though he name was Bryan, the way he acts sometimes, she would tease him by calling him Dragon. That was her little nickname for him.

While her mother had called him every word known for being a brute, she knew better, her Dragon was a sweet man. And the one thing she knew for sure was that he loved her, and that she loved him.

And that fateful day was when she knew everything was all over for her.

'_They say that my famous tenant held down my husband while I chopped his head off._'

She didn't know what caused the feeling at first all she knew was that something was terribly wrong. And she needed to go to her husband as quick as she could.

She wasn't quick enough.

'_But it's not true._'

Anastasia finally made it to their house, but it was all too late. Whoever did the deed obviously did not clean up. And she was forced to see the giant pool of blood drenching every square foot of the floor with his deep red blood. She stared with horror dripping off of her face with the sight of his body separated from his head.

After an eternal moment she finally found her voice long enough for the trapped scream to escape her throat in a high pitched volume. And she hurried over to her beloved's side, knowing there were no words to give either of them comfort. And though it went everything she ever believed in, everything she learned from her upbringing, she didn't jerk away from the gore and carnage that was her husband. She didn't want to leave him.

She even hugged his headless body closer to hers as if she could somehow bring him back, or that she was having a horrible dream and she needed to be waking back to sense.

It didn't take long for the neighbors to hear her scream and call the cops. It took even less time for the officers to arrive at her front door kicking it down and storming her house.

Her grip on Dragon loosened a little from shock.

Three of the officers held their guns at her, as if they thought she had killed. It never occurred to her how guilty she looked drenched in her husband's blood, while she was hugging his corpse.

It took her a moment to realize why they were aiming at her. They thought she killed him.

That information had sent a shock throughout her entire body that this time she did let go of her husband's body, but one hand remained on his arm.

"_No, no!_" She tried to reason out with them but they just pulled her away from Bryan's body, leaving her despair crashing over her once again.

"_NO!_" She cried out and she tried to go back to him, even without his head, she forgot that he was in fact dead.

The officers said something, in English, which she didn't understand, but because he pulled out hand cuffs and clasped it at her wrist told her what she couldn't hear from them.

"_Wait, wait, please stop…_" She tried to reason with them hoping on of these officers could understand her.

'_I am innocent_'

They didn't understand her. In fact they seemed to be even angrier at her though she had no idea why. She could understand, hardly, anything they said.

She at least had a trial, and she tried to make her case, but nobody understood her. But the words she did hear put her hearts into a greater shock then the reason why she was here.

"You are to be executed."

'_I don't understand why Uncle Sam says I did it. I tried to explain at the police station but they didn't understand me._'

But they threw in jail any way, to be hanged in five months.

It was the worst five months of her life.

There were other women here who did indeed kill their lovers and husbands, but she couldn't find herself to be friends with any of them. Because even if she did kill her Dragon, it would only be on purpose and she couldn't have lived with herself anyway.

These women however…

It was astounding, and unfair how she was to be killed for being called guilty when she was innocent and these women just got jail for killing their men… And actually being proud of it.

Three of the women, practically young girls, tried to explain to her how the men they killed had deserved their punishment. But only because they had each of their cells right next to each other. The long haired blonde seemed to even think that Anastasia killed her husband.

The dark haired girl seemed to be sort of supportive, but still, Anastasia didn't like her company, even though she tried her hardest to teach her more English. Which meant she could understand people much more clearly. But all she could manage to say herself were two words; Not. Guilty.

The other blonde hair girl, with the curls, at least seemed nicer. Until she heard her story for why she was sent here, in a way it sort of terrified her. But she was the most kind to her. She even gave her a pen and paper to share her story. But she couldn't explain every detail. Her English wasn't that good yet. But she still learned enough to write what she could.

The small blonde read it carefully and asked her the question no one even asked her… Or at least not in her language.

'_Yeah but did you do it?_'

'_Uh-uh!_'

And those where the last words she spoke to any of them before, right after, she was dragged from her cell to the gallows.

She was presented to an angry crowed, probably all believing the rumor of her husband's death. The lies that was spread somehow.

The man who was to release the trigger for her to fall to her demise was, at least kind enough to her, helping her up to meet her demise easier, with her steps hesitant and choppy.

"Is there any last words you would like to say for yourself?" The question was probably meant to be unkind, but was spoken in a strange tone, and since she could barely hear the words in that alien, to her at least, accent, mixed with the fact that she was still new to learning the English language. But she heard, and understood, him just fine.

And even with the noose hanging around her neck, she knew exactly what her last words would be.

'_NOT GUILTY!_'

And with that she was hung. But it happened so quick she didn't even register it. All she knew was that she was surrounded by surrounding whiteness. She also saw her Dragon looking like he was waiting for her with open arms.

She ran to him immediately… ignoring the rope burns around her neck and the scar around his own.

**I had to at least end it that same in a somewhat happy note… And fun fact about this chapter, I originally wanted this to be for Stevie Rae and Rephiam… until I realized I'd have to kill them both off. And when I figured that Stevie Rae's roll would be soooo much better Killing that slimy-son-of-a-bitch-Dallas WHILE having an affair seemed a lot more true to the series then killing them both off… While this seemed more in tune to the book. Where both Anastasia and Dragon dies but finds happiness in paradise. Only the timing of who was killed was reversed…. Next up Scissero… And believe me that one I am looking the most forward to… It's going to be EPIC! In fact I was excited doing that one once the idea for doing this came to mind. Stay in tuned… I'm going to take a break for my other FF. See ya!**


End file.
